Are You A Man Struggling To Find A Balance?
 

Are you feeling angry, isolated or experiencing a sense of frustration and dissatisfaction with your life?

Then you might benefit from sharing your concerns with a professional.

Because of the way males are socialized in our culture, which is to be self-reliant and stoic and to ‘act’ rather than feel, men mostly don't seek counselling. They may fear that they will be seen to be needy, or weak, or perhaps they don't think they need counselling. It might be quite an alien idea in their mind. Going to counselling for some support can be difficult at first, but the benefits will be numerous.

 

By sharing your concerns with somebody who is totally separate from your life, you will give yourself the opportunity to view your frustrations and problems from a new perspective, and possibly be able to move past some of your old beliefs that no longer serve or support you. The benefits may include enhancing your ability to develop closer and stronger relationships with the people who are important to you, including your kids.

Men & Depression

 

Because men tend to hide their feelings, and because depression can present itself quite differently in men to what we "perceive" as depressive symptoms, it can often be unrecognized--by themselves, colleagues, family and even physicians. Why is this the case?

 

  • The symptoms of depression in men are different from the "blue mood" which typifies it in women.
     

  • Men typically resist seeking help and male friends and colleagues don't ask in depth questions.
     

  • Men don't equate sexual problems with depression.

     

However, male depression can have devastating affects on the sufferer, as well as his family and colleagues. Depression can lead to a substantial drop in productivity and work performance and it has a huge impact on relationships and families. Depression can hit men later in life, especially if they experience a downward social shift or loss of status, as this is such an important part of their identity and self-esteem. Men can also be very vulnerable to depression after a marriage break-up, especially if they are separated from their children.

Depressive symptom differences in men and women:

Symptoms in Men

 

  • Blames others

  • Anger, irritability, ego inflation

  • Feels suspicious, guarded

  • Creates conflict 

  • Restlessness and agitation

  • Compulsiveness

  • Sleeps too little

  • Becomes controlling

  • Shame (eg. sex performance)

  • Fear of failure

  • Becomes over status-conscious

  • Self-medicates through alcohol

  • Over use of internet/TV/email

Symptoms in Women

 

  • Tendency to self-blame

  • Feels sad, apathetic, worthless

  • Feels anxious, frightened

  • Avoids conflict

  • Slows down, nervousness

  • Procrastination

  • Sleeps too much

  • Difficulty maintaining boundaries

  • Guilt

  • Problems with success

  • Assumes low status

  • Self-medicates through food

  • Withdrawal

Counselling

 

As well as resolving current feelings of depression, frustration and possible issue around anger, talking to a profession can help you feel that you are taking back in control of your life.  Counselling will help you master psychological skills and practices that promote lasting resilience to depression and long term mental health and wellbeing.  Also discovering you are not the only male going through these experiences, will normalise it for you. Just as physical health involves diet and exercise,  mental health requires ongoing psychological self-care.

 

In an environment where you will experience support, understanding and respect, you will be able to move beyond your present struggles and cultivate positive changes.

 

Helpful Tips for Overcoming Depression

 

Recognise the problem. Admitting that you are depressed and seeking help is the important first step. It takes courage to admit it…….don’t be trapped by feelings of shame. Try to step beyond that feeling.

 

Regular Exercise

 

It has been proven that 30 minutes brisk walking a day is better than taking medication, as it lifts your mood naturally due to the endorphins that are stimulated in the brain.

 

Healthy Diet

 

Depressed men tend to have unhealthy eating habits.

 

Communication

 

The way we communicate can affect the way we feel. It is important that you communicate clearly to the people around you if you want to be heard and understood. Many problems occur in relationships due to misunderstandings in communication. It can be a good idea to check and make sure that the person you are communicating with has interpreted your message correctly. Do this by getting them to tell you what they heard.

 

Spirituality

 

This could involve yoga and meditation, or joining a prayer group. It can be very helpful to connect with your inner world and what you are feeling.

 

Social Support

 

Many men have limited social support outside of the work environment and this can create feelings of isolation, especially if going through a separation or divorce. Establishing new networks and taking up new hobbies can be an important step in opening up the opportunity to create new friendships and supports.

 

If you are feeling down

call June for an appointment

0431 483 017

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Address

Unit 3, 89 Bentons Road,

Mornington  Vic   3931
june.wellness@bigpond.com
03 Mobile:  0431 483 017

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